Sorry everyone, I haven't written in awhile due to the lack of access to the computer.
I'm a busy, busy person, but not too busy for God lol. I need to specify that.
I had a different subject in mind for today, but I guess that will have to wait for my next blog.
Ever since my relationship with God has grown and blossomed, as it still is..my life has been flipped upside down for the good. I've not had a weary or unfulfilled day. And even now everyday is fulfilling and will continue to be with him in my life. But the thing i hadn't realize along my new found relationship with God, is that there are going to be crummy, weary, upsetting, rainy, terrible, horrible days. Everyone has them, as Christians we aren't immune to crisis in our lives. What defines us, is what we do with those emotions in our crisis. I assure you that you are going to make mistakes along the way, i mean Christians are humans too!
This whole coping, dealing with crisis, bitter emotions thing, is something I'm currently struggling with and I'm at a crossroads.
But after a jam session in the car with my aunt, which was an attempt to make feel a littler better [which didn't work I might add], I asked God a question. "God, why did you create the emotion heart break, and sadness?" He simply spoke to me "You have to depend on me."
Wow! I have to depend on him? But it's hard depending on him right?
But that is wear we have to realize that we aren't going to control our lives the way he is. He doesn't have bad intentions for us. Does your earthly father have bad intentions for you? Well, of course not. Well what about the ultimate father, he only does things to better you. Even the things we see as terrible, God has a bettering purpose behind each heartbreak even though we don't see it or don't want to believe it.
To keep my mind off my stuggles, i found myself listening to songs of praise on youtube, its so comforting, i felt his love surround me. But when i stopped i felt my struggles beating at me again, so i prayed of course and do things to keep me busy.
The point of this blog, is to say at your lowest of lows, whenever your broken , God is there to fulfill you. And he will if you call on him. And it is so hard to call on him whenever you are upset, but don't be mad at him, i found myself being selfish and wanting to blame him. But who am i to blame him for anything I was angry asking him "WHY do i have to do this, if you loved me you wouldn't ask me to do something that i would never want to do." But only time will tell, he has something for everyone.
We have to trust him.
Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. in all your ways acknowledge him and he will make your paths straight. Proverbs 3:5-6